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Sunday, November 06, 2005

Praying Off Center

Centering Prayer is a method of contemplative prayer that began in some Roman Catholic monasteries and is now becoming more widespread in ecumenical circles. Even some pastors in my own denomination (The Lutheran Church - Missouri Synod) are now advocating it.

Essentially, it is just a form of self-hypnosis. It utilizes breathing techniques, mantras and emptying the mind in order to find God within. Oh, various Christians are trying to bring it more in line with their doctrine, but it doesn't take a rocket surgeon to see how thin these attempts really are.

OK, so I read this book called Journey Back to Eden: My Life and Times Among the Desert Fathers by Mark Gruber. The author is a Benedictine monk and professor who spent a year living in Egypt observing Coptic Christianity, particularly in the desert monasteries. Fascinating book, by the way.

At one point, he is attending a meeting of Coptic monks from around the world including some from the U.S. Some of the other monks were very curious to ask the Americans about stuff they'd heard about monasticism in the West. Here is the quote:


"The wondered about the Oriental practices that have been entering into Western Churches, such as meditation, breathing, and stretching exercises, which are designed to "center" a person. The Coptic Orthodox monks didn't like the idea of being centered by techniques, and even if that were possible, they thought it couldn't be as efficacious or important as being centered by faith in the Paschal Mysteries of Christ."
EXACTLY!! That's what I'm saying. Maybe every Lutheran pastor should be required to live in a Coptic monastery for at least one year before being given a parish. Maybe 12 months sleeping on the ground, eating sheep cheese and praying the entire psalter (all of it) every morning would clear out some debris.

All I have to say is, "Where is the discernment?"

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Saturday, November 05, 2005

Some DVDs I've Been Enjoying


This is not to be confused with the awful James Spader movie of the same name. This movie has some offensive language and situations. But it is the best film I have ever seen that deals with racism from all angles. It's not what you might expect. I highly recommend it.


A WWII drama set in a Japanese prison camp. Inspired by true events. The screenplay was written by Brian Godawa whose book Hollywood Worldviews is an outstanding read. This excellent film starring Kiefer Sutherland is one of the best film presentations of the gospel I have ever seen without being preachy.


I just love this little known film. Ed Harris is great. See if you can discern what the third miracle is.


A bit too scary at parts for the little ones, but an excellent entertainment. Johnny Depp is brilliant. Do I detect him channelling a bit of Keith Richards here? Funny and exciting.

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Some Music I Recommend

Here are some CDs I've been listening to recently. I'm particularly obsessing over the Fiona Apple and Mindy Smith CDs right now.

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Friday, November 04, 2005

The Vampire Chronicler on Jesus

Anne Rice is best known for her erotic vampire thrillers beginning with Interview with the Vampire which was later made into a successful film. I've read a couple of her vamp novels and seen the film. As a writer, there is no question that Rice is highly skilled. Her stories are filled with lush detail, romantic atmosphere and hypnotic characters. She expertly recreates exotic locales and times past with brilliant clarity. Her stories are also typically filled with sex and gore. And gory sex. You get the idea.

So you can imagine my skepticism when I first heard that she was writing a novel about Jesus Christ. All this world needs is another libidinous occultist opining on the Savior. (Note that I'm also trying to use as many 3-4 syllable words as I can.) But I'm going to reserve final judgment until I've actually read her newest book, Christ the Lord : Out of Egypt.

A few years ago, Rice recommitted herself to the Roman Catholic faith of her upbringing. As far as I could say, she is sincere in her dedication to the dogmas and practices of Rome. Insofar as I am delighted to see anyone becoming serious about Christianity, I commend her.

Though Christian orthodoxy was not exactly prevalent in her earlier writings, even her vampire books were filled with Christian-esque spiritual themes: sacrifice, atonement, immortality and damnation. The Bible says that the life of the flesh is in the blood (Leviticus 17:11) and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness (Hebrews (9:22). Somehow I think those ideas never left her. And perhaps after her soul became tired of exotic experimentation with those themes, the Holy Spirit brought her back to the base of the gory cross of the God-man.

Based on what little I've read (here and here) about Christ the Lord: Out of Egypt, it's mostly fictional. History simply tells us next to nothing about the years the Holy Family spent in Egypt. My understanding is that Rice does draw somewhat from apocryphal legends about the childhood of Jesus. This troubles me because the sources of these tales tend to be gnostic pseudapigrapha. Knowing her style, however, I also imagine the book to be filled with thoroughly researched historical accuracy regarding the times depicted. The author states that she wanted to deal with the subject with reverance and authenticity, as a sincere believer. She derides liberal demytholigization characteristic of the charlatans in the Jesus Seminar. And that, in my eyes, earns her a hearing.

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Thursday, November 03, 2005

It's a Good Thing They're Pacifists

So I read this article about a bunch of anti-Bush protesters in San Francisco. One of them threw a molotov cocktail and lit up a police officer.

Actually, my title is inaccurate. These protesters are definitely not pacifists. In fact, it's kind of appropriate for them to be throwing molotov cocktails since the organization behind the protest, "World Can't Wait," is a revolutionary agency, founded by avowed communists. And by "revolutionary," I don't mean, "they're really innovative and cutting edge." I mean r-e-v-o-l-u-t-i-o-n. Revolt. Read their own FAQ page. If you don't smell the Leninism, you aren't paying attention. They admit that they want to stir upset in society in order to wake the rest of us up. They state that they intend to further polarize the nation because that will be necessary for making progress. Hmmmm... Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel anyone? Where've we heard this type of talk before?

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Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Veggie Tales Jesus

If you aren't aware, Veggie Tales are popular cartoons that re-tell Bible stories with all the characters represented as talking vegetables. The quality of the animation and humor is pretty good and they have a stong moral emphasis.

Rev. Paul McCain, over at Cyberbrethren brought the product pictured above to our attention recently.

I have two points I'd like to make. The first one having to do with the Veggie Tales Nativity scene here. And the second point regards Veggie Tales in general.

First, this nativity scene is very cute, I admit. I'm sure they'll sell a bunch of them. And sometimes I really get tired of being a curmudgeon. But this is just too goofy folks. We are talking about turning the Almighty Son of God, the eternal Creator of all things, into a carrot. Would you think it disrespectful of God if we made a cartoon of the life of Jesus and represented our Lord as a radish? Or maybe the cartoons would use animals instead. Would you think it appropriate to have a nativity scene with a puppy in the manger? Or maybe Jesus as a frog nailed to the cross. What's next? A Mr. Potatoehead Holy Ghost?

Why is it that we equate cute with harmless? This Veggie Tales scene is cute, but not harmless. I have no doubt that the real baby Jesus was adorable. Aren't all babies? Well, almost, right? But the shepherds came to worship him. The scene of Christ's birth should be more than just sweet and cute. It should inspire awe and reverance and holy fear. Thanks Veggie Tales for undermining the birth of the Savior.

And secondly, on Veggie Tales in general. I have a son who is now 10 years old. When he was little, we bought and played Veggie Tales videos for him. And some of my orthodox confreres might want to poison my beer after I say this, but in a way I kinda like them. I have absolutely nothing against moralizing to children. We should moralize to our children. Only negligent irresponsible parents fail to moralize to their children.

HOWEVER, I'm still not thrilled with portraying the great biblical saints as produce. Please do not honor me (not that I'm in the ranking with the biblical saints) by painting me as a turnip. But my chief concern with Veggie Tales is the moralizing. Now, I know what I just wrote above. I'm not contradicting myself. I am in favor of moralizing, I just don't think that is the chief purpose of the Holy Scriptures. When we tell the story of God, the point is not "be moral" or "be good" and certainly not "be nice." The point of the plot of the bible is Jesus Christ, Savior of sinners. If that is not the point of telling the bible story, then you have not spoken the Word of God, no matter where you got your script.

If you want to moralize your children - and you should - use Aesop's fables. There's a lot of good natural law morality there. Or use the Bible, but if you use the Bible and fail to end with the cross, you may as well stick with Aesop.

And by the way, Veggie Tales, a tomato is a fruit.

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Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Well, Aren't I Special!

Hey all,
I just noticed that I've been given two very prestigious blogging pats on the back.

First, I was notified that one of my recent posts received the Golden Aardvark Aaward by Aardvark Alley.

And then I saw that I've been named the very first Lutheran Blog of the week.

First of all - and I'll keep this short maestro - I'd like to thank all my fans. It's all for you!!! And I want to thank my wife who puts up with a lot of *&$#@ from me, I'm sad to say. And finally, I'd like to thank myself because I couldn't have done it without me.

You may now all address me as Excellency please.

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Ghosts on Film

My darling niece in Colorado sent us a Halloween e-mail with a pretty creepy vid attachment. I've found it on the net and link to it. I don't believe in ghosts and I'll maybe explain that in a future post. But I do believe in evil spirits who may very well masquerade as spirits of the dead to deceive us.

Well anyway, some car company was making a commercial and caught something really bizarre on their film. Watch closely as the car winds down the road for a faint misty figure. As the car pulls out from behind a grove of trees, an odd mist figure appears to be following the car. Is it only a natural mist or something supernatural? I'll let you decide.

And make sure your sound is turned on because you can faintly hear the cameraman muttering about the phenomena.

Here's the link.

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Monday, October 31, 2005

You Need Hell

So a FoxNews story reports that more Americans believe in the existence of heaven than hell. Why does this not surprise me? Here's the question I'd like to hear answered. Of those Americans who believe in the existence of hell, how many of them think the chances are high that they'll go there?

I'm not a bible-thumping, asp-wielding, tent-revivaling, hellfire & brimstone preacher. But I do believe in the existence of hell. And so did Jesus. Read the Gospels. No one in the whole Bible talks more about hell and damnation that Jesus Christ. In fact, most of what we know about hell comes from the lips of the Savior.

I'm on a Christian radio talk show every Sunday night from 9-11 p.m. here in Pittsburgh. And last night, we had a caller who argued the case that Jesus was uber-tolerant and would never hurt a flea. And I told the woman, Gabrielle (ironically), that it was very evident that she had not actually read the recorded accounts of the life of Jesus. Her understanding of Jesus is like the one I described in this earlier post. The hippy peacenik Jesus, a little high on weed. "They call me mellow yellow." The Greenpeace Vegan Jesus. The Precious Moments figurine, a.k.a. the child of god(dess). Gabby, the caller, doesn't want Jesus. She wants Phil Donahue.

I'm not glad there is a hell. But there is. And it is foolish to believe - counter to the very words of Jesus Christ - that no one goes there. The preacher who never talks about hell is incompetent and should be challenged. I don't mention hell often and I don't like mentioning it when I do. Sometimes I do not enjoy preaching God's Word. But it is His Word I am called to deliver. Not my own. Not what my congregation would like to hear.

I'll wager that most people in America think, if there is a heaven, that they'll go there. Sadly, I doubt that very much. Jesus is not vague in Matthew 7 when He says that the gate to heaven is narrow and few will find it while the gate to destruction is wide and many are on their way.

And that's one reason why I have very mixed feelings about Halloween. My son will go begging for candy like all his neighbors tonight. And I will stand at the door giving Butterfingers to the little princesses, and Scream guys, and imps, and the teenager wearing the white t-shirt that simply says "Official Halloween Costume" on the front. But anything that makes light of the devil or hell is dangerous in my opinion. I wouldn't make jokes about cancer to a woman about to die with tumors pillaging her body. And I don't think we should laugh at devildom when the majority of human beings are going to be damned.

In any case, that's why we preach the gospel, right?

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New Poll

Note the new poll down the right side of the blog.

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Sunday, October 30, 2005

Which Witch is Which?

Last year, I recall reading about a school district in Washington state which was banning the celebration of Halloween. If you think this was done to appease some Christian fundies, you'd be wrong. The fact is, the decision was made because Halloween depictions of witches were offensive to . . . witches. The Wiccans complained. This year, the same thing is happening in Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

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Saturday, October 29, 2005

Holiday Books for You

As many of you know, my wife, Julie, has written a number of children's books. She has several more in the works now. But I thought I'd bring these holiday books to your attention since we are entering that time of year. Note especially the Saint Nicholas book. St. Nick day is Dec 6.

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Friday, October 28, 2005

All Time Best Novels

Thanks to Wendy at Tales from the Dorkside for bringing this to our attention. The editors at Time magazine have compiled a list of what they consider the 100 greatest English language novels from 1923 to the present. Here is the whole list.

These are the ones I've read. What about you?

  • Animal Farm by George Orwell
  • The Assistant by Bernard Malamud
  • The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
  • The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
  • The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
  • The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis
  • Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov
  • Lord of the Flies by William Golding
  • The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien
  • The Moviegoer by Walker Percy
  • 1984 by George Orwell
  • The Power and the Glory by Graham Greene
  • Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
  • The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway
  • To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
I number 15. Should be more, I suppose, but I can't help thinking of all the great books not on their list too.

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Thursday, October 27, 2005

New Narnia Movie Trailer

Thanks to Beggars All for bringing this to our attention. There is a new trailer out for The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe movie. Go here. The book has long meant a lot to me. So I'm on pins and needles waiting for the movie. If it is well-made and sticks to the text, this could be a very useful tool for the Church.

First, because it is a ripping story. Full of strange creatures, an evil witch, mighty wonders and bloody battles.

Second, because it conveys Christian truth expertly in the narrative:

  • Sin. The character of Edward illustrates the hold that sin has on our nature. It is like an addiction. It's a hunger, a desire, a passion, lust, envy, greed, pride, idolatry. It's all the same. Sin is being curved in on oneself. Sin is - at its core - looking for fulfillment in anyone or anything other than God through Christ.
  • The Devil. Satan has control over the world, but not complete control. Ultimately, he is still God's devil. And God is supreme. Yet, under the devil's sway, all of creation is cast into a winter-never-Christmas. All color is gone. Life no longer blooms. Warmth is a memory.
  • Substitutionary Atonement. The one eternal Son of God submits to the law and is cruelly murdered in place of the sinner. His death releases the sinner from his bondage forever.
  • Resurrection. There is nothing at all remarkable about the resurrection of God's Son. What else would "The Life" do but live. The remarkable thing is that He died in the first place.
  • Christus Victor. The Lord will crush the serpent's head. The witch and her followers will be damned.
Others who've written about C.S. Lewis and Christian theology in The Chronicles of Narnia can expound on this much further and much better. But all of what I've mentioned is clearly portrayed in the narrative of the upcoming film (assuming it remains faithful ot the book).

And that is why I believe this film has the potential for being a much better tool for Christian evangelism than Mel Gibson's movie The Passion of the Christ. Gibson showed. This tells. And I think telling is better than showing alone.

Gibson showed us the crucifixion, but never explained its meaning. Image has value. But without explanation, the image alone can easily mislead. Luther complained that people meditate on the passion of the Christ and either feel sorry for Jesus or get mad at the Jews, neither of which were the intent of his suffering and death.

I admire Lewis's accomplishments. Hopefully this film will help us tell about Christ to a generation who simply don't know anything, though they think they know enough.

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My blog is worth $80,164.68.
How much is your blog worth?

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005

World Series Crisis: No Black Astros

People are complaining that there are no black players on the Houston Astros's lineup. See here. Apparently, this is the first time this has been the case for a World Series team in fifty years. Now I could understand the complaint if someone were alleging that qualified black players were being discriminated against and kept off the team on the basis of their race. That would be terrible.

But, as yet, no one has made that allegation. Even those who are complaining about the situation state that the cause is that the majority of black athletes are going into other sports, such as basketball and football.

The Astros general manager said,"I think it's a huge, huge problem for baseball." I'm just not seeing the point. Why is this a problem if we're not talking about discrimination? Are black athletes bad people for choosing other sports to pursue? There aren't a lot of African Americans playing professional hockey either. So what? How many Asian-Americans play football? What's the problem?

Baseball is a fine sport and an American tradition. And I'd be delighted to see plenty of talented African American players on every team. But are there not enough legitimate reasons for outrage in this world that we have to get stirred up over this?

HT: Bunnie Diehl

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Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Wallace and Gromit Movie

A terrific treat. My wife wrote a brief review here. And a film geek friend wrote this review. Check them out.

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Pittsburgh Unprepared for Full-Scale Zombie Attack

As a Pittsburgher, this article concerned me very much. Particularly the bit about FUMA's incompetence. FUMA = Federal Undead Management Agency.

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Monday, October 24, 2005

Additions to the Blogroll

This is something I've been meaning to do for a while. There are millions of blogs out there. Many of them quite good. It's just not possible to put every worthwhile blog on one's blogroll. I do try to promote my fellow LCMS (Lutheran Church-Missouri Synod) bloggers. But tonight I added a new category. Simply Blogs of Interest. They are mostly religious in nature, but not necessarily. I don't necessarily endorse or agree with every single thing they write. But I do read them on a regular basis and encourage you to check them out.

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Lutheran Carnival IX Is Up and Running

Blog carnivals are great ways to discover new and interesting blogs. Go see this week's Lutheran Blog Carnival hosted by Be Strong in the Grace.

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Sunday, October 23, 2005

No Jesus in School, Antonio!

Antonio was in kindergarten at Baldwinsville Elementary School in New York. Antonio was assigned to draw a picture about saving the environment. Antonia created a poster of people holding hands around the world with recycle bins, etc. And along the edge was an unidentified bearded man reaching his arms toward the earth. Antonio acknowledged that the bearded man represents Jesus. The school did allow Antonio's picture to be displayed with all the others but someone first folded down the side that had the Jesus figure so he couldn't be seen. None of the other posters were censored in any way. And Antonio's parents have been fighting this in court since 1999. Here is the news release.

Am I bonkers or is this just getting out of hand? IN WHAT SENSE does a five-year-old's drawing of Jesus break the law? The Constitution simply says that Congress shall not establish an official religion or prohibit the free exercise thereof. It says nothing about children drawing pictures of Jesus. Simply allowing a child to express his beliefs does not mean the state is imposing a religion on anyone else. Let the Jews draw Moses. Let the Muslims draw Mohammed. Let the Mormons draw Joseph Smith. Let the Jedis draw Yoda. Good grief! Before you know it, they'll be telling us we can't say "under God" in the pledge of allegiance or something.

Hat tip: Lost Budgie Blog

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I Like Cats

Someone I know has in his e-mail signature this quip: I like cats. . . they taste just like chicken.

Some people are dog people and others are cat people. I must be a pet hermaphrodite because I own some of each. Actually I think I'm just compensating. I don't like dogs so much as I like wolves and dogs are the closest I can get. And I don't like cats so much as I like lions. You get the idea.

A few days ago, I posted a link to a funny vid of kitty cats doing wild and crazy things. So a friend sent me this link. It's about some German inventor who claims he's found a way to make cheap diesel fuel out of dead cats. My friend is yanking my chain.

But if the bizarre story is true. I don't have a problem with using cat carcasses for fuel. Set up a system so all the pets that are euthanized by veterinarians every day get picked up and shipped to the conversion station where the cheap diesel fuel is produced. Why not?

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Friday, October 21, 2005

What Movie Trailers Can Teach Us About the Analogy of Faith

Have you ever noticed that many cultists like to use the Christian bible to try to prove their errant positions? The Mormons, for instance, quote the King James Bible to you in your living room while you politely offer them coffee, tea or Pepsi.

In the second century, St. Irenaeus wrote against the gnostic heretics. And he too noticed that false teachers love to throw out bible proof texts. A couple of centuries later, the Arians were tying to make the bible say things it doesn't say. This is a common thing.

St. Irenaeus used this illustration. He said to imagine a large and beautiful mosaic of a king made from many gems and stones and precious metals. Now imagine that some rascal sneaks along and craftily re-arranges the tiles into something new, a picture of a mangey dog. All the pieces were the same. They'd just been misused and put out of order.

That is what the heretics do with God's Word. They use faulty or idiosyncratic translations. They quote half a verse. They pull things from context. They misapply and mislead. Anyone could quote the bible to justify nearly anything. In order to understand the Bible, there are rules of interpretation that must be followed. And chief among them is that no reading shall counter the analogy of faith, the kerygma. In other words, the Bible must be understood in light of the Gospel. I firmly support sola scriptura. But that does not change the fact that we have a fundamental understanding of the faith handed down from the preaching of the apostles, encapsulated in the historic creeds, and confessed through the ages. By this approach, no reading of scripture may contradict the analogy of faith.

And that was the point of St. Irenaeus. You can twist the bits and pieces all you like, but without the grand design, you won't see the picture correctly.

All of this came to mind when I discovered a trend in the blogosphere. Somehow people are creating new movie trailers for old movies and doing so in a way that completely changes your impression of the film. They use only footage from the film but arrange it in a new manner so that it appears to be something it is not.

Here is Alfred Hitchcock's famous thriller Psycho presented as a tender love story.

Here is the syrupy love story Titanic presented as a horror movie.

And here is the nightmarish Stanley Kubrick flick, Shining, presented as a warm-hearted family dramady.

Further info here.

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Thursday, October 20, 2005

Atheist Philip Pullman Derides "Wardrobe" Movie

As almost everyone in the English-speaking world knows by now, C.S. Lewis's classic The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe is being adapted into a feature film, due out this December. Naturally, one is concerned that Disney not mess it up. Why would anyone think that? Because of how they almost always mess up fairy tales and folklore with their sappy and often soul-less renditions. Turning Pocahontas from a devoted Christian into a tree-hugging new ager is a key example. However, the initial reports from those who've seen major bits of the film are that the Christian doctrine contained in the story has not been removed, watered-down or ruined by the Disney Imagineers.

While most Christians who are familiar with the book are delighted (if mildly skeptical) that it is being launched on the silver screen, not everyone is pleased. Writer Philip Pullman claims that C.S. Lewis's fanatasy classic lacks any evidence of - get this - love. I suppose giving one's life for the salvation of all doesn't count as love. Jesus said, "There is no greater love than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." Let me see here. Pullman or Jesus? Jesus or Pullman? Which one is right about this whole definition of love thing?

Philip Pullman is an outspoken atheist whose own fantasy trilogy, His Dark Materials, portrays the Christian Church as evil and God as a demented fraud. It seems that he is like many contemporary folk who equate love with being nice. And since Aslan is not always nice, he is not loving enough for Pullman. The books says that Aslan is not a tame lion. And I would say that God is not a tame God. He is dangerous. He is merciful, but He is also severe.

I love the Narnia books precisely because they portray Christ as spiritually muscular. He is very compassionate, but never weak. And He will do anything it takes to save us, even if that means he has to hurt us (or kill us) to do it.

What Pullman wants is not the Jesus of the Scriptures, the Jesus of authentic Christianity, but a vegan hippie Jesus who is in touch with his inner puppy. A live-and-let-live Jesus. A Timothy Leary Jesus. A flower power Jesus who exfoliates with his loofah in between group hugs.

Pullman is not alone in this. Many folks today are turned off by the blood, sweat and tears of Biblical Christianity (not that you actually find much of this anymore). What they really seek is nice-ianity. And when true religion does not match their poppy-induced caricature, they say the church is wrong.


UPDATE: I've written a new article discussing the controversy over "The Golden Compass" movie. Go here. It will take you to a link where you can download my article.

Hat tip to Jottings and Such

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Wednesday, October 19, 2005

No Comment

Right.

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Lutheran Blogger Conference

This is a notice to all the Lutheran bloggers out there. What would you think about us scheduling a get-together? Many of us already know each other, but this would still be a great chance to meet and greet.

Here's the idea. The annual theological symposia at Concordia Theological Seminary, Ft. Wayne is already a big event. Many of us go there every year. Ft. Wayne is also relatively centrally located. The symposia begins Tuesday morning. How about we have a mini-conference on Monday? We could get a couple of us to speak on blog-related topics. I already have some interesting ideas in that regard. I can contact the seminary to see about getting space, etc. But first, I want to know what sort of interest is out there. So, leave a comment if this is something you'd attend. And contact other Lutheran bloggers who might not see this message and have them come and give their input too.

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Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Madonna: Prophetess of Doom

Madonna has now become a prophetess of doom. Not The Madonna, as in St. Mary the Mother of God. But as in Madonna Ciccone, pop super-star, aka Esther.

According to Matt Drudge, Madonna has proclaimed that everyone will go to hell if they don't turn from their wicked ways. Uh, yeah. That's true. I believe that. And frankly, I'm glad to know she's figured that out.

Unfortunately, it doesn't appear that she has discovered the solution. Of course, admitting you have a problem is the first step toward recovery. So maybe she's made that crucial first step.

But the answer to hell is not the esoteric, Jewish, mystical cult, Hollywierd celebrity freakshow she has embraced in Kabbalah. Or Kabbalah-lite as is the version most of these movie hipsters are tinkering with right now. From things I've read, Madonna (I'll keep calling her by her Christian name, thankyouverymuch) is probably more serious about her religious pursuit than many of her entertainer colleagues. For so many of them (Britney, Paris, Demi), one gets the impression that Kabbalah is just the latest semi-religious fad. Kind of like the Jesus is My Homeboy T-shirts everyone was wearing a year ago.

Madonna, if you're out there reading my blog (as if), I am very happy that you have apparently had some new spiritual awakenings. However, the gnostico-Judaism you have entered holds no true enlightenment. Jesus Christ is the light of the world, the light that scatters all darkness. I sincerely pray that you will return to your Christian roots and discover the great blessing your namesake, the Theotokos, bore into the world. Be like our Lady and magnify the Lord Jesus Christ with us.

Turn from your wicked ways, yes. But do not turn toward a pack of deceptions for relief. Turn to the one who bore your wickedness in his own body to atone for your sins and mine.

[Note: If any of you have Madonna's e-mail address, please forward this post to her.]

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I Like Cats

Someone kindly sent me a link to this hilarious video. If you want to see a clip filled with funny cat incidents, go here.

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Monday, October 17, 2005

Vote in the New Poll

It's been a while since I've had a new poll. Please scroll down. It's on the right. The question is "What is Your Favorite Anthony Hopkins Performance in a Film?" Please vote and then comment here on why you made the choice you did.

I voted for "The Elephant Man." But I could just as easily have chosen a half dozen others. What do you think?

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Sunday, October 16, 2005

Antinomianism: I'm Against It

Lutherans are occasionally accused of being antinomians. Antinomians are people who are "against the law." During the Lutheran Reformation of the Church, the reformers were calling people to a living faith in the Christ whose death fully atoned for the sins of the world. Martin Luther tells us that at the time, the only sermons one heard were either about the saints or good deeds, but little was said or known of Christ as Savior. So the Lutherans preached Christ crucified, the gospel of free salvation through faith in Him.

But then, for some, the pendulum swung too far the other direction. Over-reacting to Rome's hyper-emphasis on good works, some Lutherans talked about Jesus well enough but failed to say anything useful about living the Christian life, about sanctification.

My friends, the gospel is not a license to sin. And Luther's own writings against the antinomians of his time demonstrate that this is not Reformation doctrine.

Now today, there are some Lutheran antinomians once again. Sometimes these are the liberals who are guilty of gospel-reductionism. To them, as long as you preach justification by faith alone, everything else is negotiable. So you might hear a decent sermon about God's grace, but nothing about sin, wrath, judgment. This is what Dietrich Bonhoeffer called cheap grace. It is grace without discipleship. Forgiveness without repentance. And it ain't Lutheran. It ain't biblical.

But even amongst the traditionalist conservative Lutherans, there is a sort of antinomianism. Just about every heresy in the church is a good thing taken too far. Those who so treasure the work of Jesus on the cross can, if not vigilant, give the impression that it is not OK to talk about sanctification and living in the world as a Christian. They'll say, "Oh, that's what those Catholics do." Or more likely today, "Oh, that's what those evangelicals do." It used to be that "good" Lutherans were afraid of being identified as Romish. Now the "good" Lutherans are afraid of being compared to fundamentalists.

So the Romo-phobes among us (particularly in the first two-thirds of the 20th century) over-reacted by tossing out traditional vestments, liturgies, rites, practices, etc. Don't wear a crucifix or else you'll be thought a Catholic (O Dread!). That is ridiculous. Is it possible that today, the evangelico-phobes are so concerned about not being thought of as baptists in fancier robes, that we neglect preaching the whole counsel of God?

Being anti-anti-nomian, as I am, is not so much about what I'm against. It's about being FOR preaching the law of God, first as a mirror which reveals my sin, but also as a rule for life. It's about preaching the work of the Holy Spirit in the Christian, through the Word. It's about vocation. It's about understanding the two realms we inhabit.

Pastor Paul McCain has an excellent post with a link to an excellent article on this very subject.


Addendum: I just wanted to add a few words to this post as a result of some of the sage comments readers have left.

It has been correctly pointed out that the law always accuses us. Every time you hear the law of God proclaimed, the Holy Spirit will use it to convict you of your sin. The law always accuses. It accuses us even if the preacher's intent is not to accuse, but to inform or instruct. Since we can never fully adhere to the instruction of God, the law always accuses us.

The law always accuses, but it does not only accuse. When I preach a sermon (Law and Gospel with the Gospel predominating), I don't figure "well, here I will use the law to accuse" and "here I will use the law to instruct in holy living." I just preach as clearly and faithfully as I am able and trust the Holy Spirit to apply it to the hearer.

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Saturday, October 15, 2005

Cute, no?

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Come Check Out My Merchandise

Dudes and Dudettes,

Come take a gander at the new Burr in the Burgh store right here. Everything there I designed myself. So if you hate it, send me a nasty-gram. And if you love it, buy, buy, buy! Personally, I think the "I Am Baptized Into Christ" baby wear is quite unique.

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Friday, October 14, 2005

Tattoo You!

So, I'm thinking of getting a tattoo. Sort of an early stage of my mid-life crisis, no doubt. Am I too young for MAN-o-pause? I'm thinking St. George slaying the dragon. What do you think?

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How Heavy Is Your Soul?

How heavy is your soul? Well, I guess that depends on what you've been feeding it. Not really.

There was a dark and depressing movie a while back called 21 Grams. The title is supposed to be based on a notion that that is how much lighter weight the human body becomes just after the moment of death. Sound crazy?

Apparently, a scientist once conducted studies to determine if the human soul could be empirically measured. He built a super-sensitive scale and laid a number of dying patient on it until they finally expired. Then he took note of any change in their weight. He supposedly took into account all the different variables and concluded that there is a slight change, though it differed somewhat from person to person. Not uniformly 21 grams, in other words. So I guess some people do have heavier souls than others, eh?

Interestingly, when he performed the same experiment upon dogs, there was no change in weight. That only makes senes because God only breathed the breath (spirit) of life into man.

I am writing this tongue-in-cheek because my Christian understanding of the spiritual nature of man is that the spirit is immaterial, as in, not generally having the characteristics of matter, nor being ordinarily perceptible by the five human senses.

Oh, this scientist's studies have been discredited and rejected but . . . it is interesting.

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Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Scare the Kids: Not a Halloween Post

Here's a great quote for you:

"Children like to be scared," he said. "It is good for them to be scared, if they are scared of the right things."

And who said that? It was Douglas Gresham, the stepson of C.S. Lewis at a sneak peak of the new film based on Lewis's book The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Go here. And all I can say is A-M-E-N. Apparently, some woman in the audience was concerned that children would be upset by the battle scene between the Lion Aslan and the White Witch.

Have you ever noticed that modern editions of classic fairytales often sanitize the stories of the violence and gore? That drives me bonkers. Or what about all those who complained about the violence in Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ? Give me a break.

I saw a Precious-Moments-like figurine one time of the crucifixion of Jesus. Now that is what I find terrifying. Let's make the blood sacrifice of God's Son into something cute. If you ask me, cuteness and our love of cuteness is playing a large part in the undermining of the American Church. And we wonder why our pews are filled mostly with women and children. No men. Because it's all just too sweet.

I believe that adults harm their children by shielding them too much from the harsh reality of blood and suffering in the world. Obviously, I don't mean we should be trying to give our toddlers nightmares.

I don't know if Gresham is correct that children like to be scared. But he is dead right that it is good for children to be scared of the right things. Anyone ever hear of stranger danger? Don't take candy from a man in a trenchcoat alone in a playground? Being scared can be a good thing.

St. Peter said, "Be Alert!" He wasn't talking about pedophiles, but something much worse. Because the devil wants nothing more than to gobble you up for lunch.

As a father, I want my son to know that there is danger in the world. But you can bet your petunias that I will all the more vigorously impress upon him that Christ has overcome the world for us. Christus Victor!

Dr. Gene Veith is directing a great discussion over at the Cranach blog on the upcoming Narnia movie.

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Tuesday, October 11, 2005

The Cranach Institute Has a Blog


The Cranach Institute is an arm of Concordia Theological Seminary, Ft. Wayne, IN. And its mission is to examine how Lutheran theology engages contemporary culture and particularly the contribution of the doctrine of vocation. The next time you have a few extra shekels, consider throwing a donation their way.

I'm delighted to say that Dr. Gene Edward Veith, Cranach's director, now runs a blog.

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Lutheran Carnival VIII

Blog Carnivals are a good way to be introduced to lots of interesting sites. This is the first time I've participated in the Lutheran Carnival. Go see Lutheran Carnival VIII at Full Throttle & an Empty Gas Tank.

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Monday, October 10, 2005

One of Our Own in Touchstone

Touchstone magazine in one of the finer publications I receive. And today, sipping my latte at Caribou Coffee, thumbing through the latest issue, my eyes popped out of my head on springs like in those old Warner Bros. cartoons. That's how surprised and delighted I was to note a fine essay written by P.G. Alms (no relation to P.G. Wodehouse) a fellow LCMS pastor and blogger. I'm not making this up. See here.

Pastor Alms writes an insightful piece about being a pastor in today's context. Ecclesiastical entrepreneurs are always hawking the latest fad, the newest widget, the edgiest program, and the hottest technique to grow the church of Christ.

What about the gospel? Maybe we should consider giving that a try. How about preaching the cross? Baptism? Eucharist? The church may or may not grow numerically relying upon the divinely instituted means of grace, but at least it'll still be the church.



Go visit Pr. Alms's blog "Incarnatus Est." A guy who reads both Rolling Stone magazine and the ancient church fathers is guaranteed to have something interesting to say.

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Saturday, October 08, 2005

Double Standard - You Decide

In the U.K., Muslims complained that an ice-cream cup sold in Burger King had a little swirly symbol on it that resembled the Arabic word for Allah. So Burger King, so as not to offend, pulled the design. Here.

Meanwhile, in Ireland, some bookie has billboards all over Dublin with Leonardo's famous Last Supper, only the ad is altered so that Jesus and the disciples are all playing poker. A fuss was raised, but the ads are not being removed. Here.

We're talking about taking a depiction of the Holy Eucharist and making fun of it. Oh well, I guess that's not as bad as when pastors dress up like clowns or wookies in order to make the Body and Blood of Jesus seem relevant. Personally, I'd be afraid to mock God.

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Friday, October 07, 2005

You: Chance or Design?

Y'know, the other day I was walking along the beach and I came across this message scrawled in the sand: Joanie Loves Chachi. It was written in English, Welsh, Arabic, Japanese, Sanskrit and Esperanto. There was even a series of dots that I think was Braille. I was frankly astounded. I mean, can you imagine how long it took for the tide to come in and out, in and out, over and over again until that message was randomly and purposelessly etched into the sand. Oh come on! Who would even dream of that? Of course, someone wrote the message.

Give a roomful of monkeys with word processors enough time and they'll eventually tap out the Babylonian Talmud, right?

Then, looking through a microscope, I noticed a sub-cellular machine known as the bacterial flagellum. Very complex. Irreducibly complex. I wonder how long it took the blind and meaningless forces of nature to come up with that.

In my opinion, the views of microbiologist, Michael Behe, are much more reasonable.

HT: Mere Comments

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Thursday, October 06, 2005

Do We Want Ignoramuses Influencing the Education of our Children?

Barry Lynn, Director of Americans United for the Separation of Church and State and a Unitarian minister, is raising a stink in Florida because Gov. Jeb Bush is encouraging children to read C.S. Lewis's classic masterpiece The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Here's the article for a vomit-inducing read.

Lynn's objection is that Lewis's excellent children's book is an allegory of the story of Christ. Those Christian themes, he believes, make it innappropriate for the governor to endorse. By the same reasoning, we'd have to omit:

Great Expectations by Charles Dickens
The Merchant of Venice by William Shakespeare
Measure for Measure by William Shakespeare
The Divine Comedy by Dante
Le Morte D'Arthur by Sir Thomas Mallory
Les Miserables by Victor Hugo
The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne
Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky
The Idiot by Fyodor Dostoevsky
The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky
The Pilgrim's Progress by Paul Bunyan
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'engle
The poetry of John Dunne
And hundreds, even thousands, of other great workds of Western literature.

And if the concern is that the governor is promoting one religion over others, then we can't promote the reading of:

Siddhartha by Herman Hesse for promoting Buddhism
His Dark Materials (trilogy) by Philip Pullman for promoting atheism
The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown for promoting pop-gnosticism
And just about anything recommended by Oprah Winfrey for New Agey-ness

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Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Appropriate Halloween Costumes

Our 10 year old son loves Halloween. What American kid does not? I can remember going trick-or-treating with him dressed as a fireman one year and as a lion another. That was so cute. But nowadays, he wants to be scary for Halloween and I have very mixed feelings about it.

Some Christians believe we should have nothing whatsoever to do with Halloween. Or if we do, it should be altered into a fall festival or Reformation celebration. I support those parents wholeheartedly. At the same time, I do not see the harm in allowing our children to dress in costumes and go door to door in the neighborhood for candy. Properly supervised, of course.

Our son knows that anything overtly satanic or occult is off the table for discussion entirely. No devil costumes or ghosts or witches. And no chainsaw murderers or bloody vampires. Ain't gonna happen. He agrees and that's not a problem.

But he does still want to be something scary. Which is weird, because he doesn't like scary stuff normally. Our attempts to dissuade him have not been too successful thus far. I said he should just go as himself. No costume. Or we suggested he go as his best friend and his best friend go as him. He could be Adam (go commando). Nah. My wife thinks he should be a bar of soap or a fork or something.

We did see a Napolean Dynamite mask. We almost had him with that one. I'm thinking of buying it for myself.

Over at The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns, I read this post about Halloween costumes from one of her guest contributors.

What are your thoughts on the whole Halloween thing?

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Oh, Those Fun-Loving Dutch

What is the deal with these people? The Culture of Death on steroids. Go here and here. Now they want to euthanize sick babies. Well, only those who are terminally ill. Why stop there? Let's euthanize all the terminally ill. No, let's euthanize everyone who gets sick because they'll be terminal someday. Ah shucks, let's just kill everyone.

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Monday, October 03, 2005

New Lutheran Blogs to Check Out

As soon as I get myself in gear, I'll add these fine blogs to my blogroll:

  • Pr. Scot Kinnaman has entered the fray with Blog My Soul. Good stuff, even if he does spell his name wrong.

  • Pr. Bill Cwirla's creatively named Rev. Cwirla's Blogosphere. (His name is pronounced Kwirla. . . not really. It's Swirla.) Not only are his sermons top-notch, but he's a great resource for apologetics. Not for the faint of heart.

  • For the Lutheran deaconess perspective, go to Quicunque vult. Anyone cool enough to name her blog from the Latin of the Athanasian Creed is going to be worth your attention.

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Saturday, October 01, 2005

Watching TV May Impede Learning

Headline: Water is Wet or Heat is Hot. That's kind of how I feel about this MSNBC headline: TV in Child's Room May Hinder Learning. Naw, y'think?

A small child's brain is still developing and forming connections. Studies show that viewing the 2-dimensional screen with flashing images of light retards the development of verbal abilities.

Now some pediatricians are saying that when a small child watches a lot of television he is more likely to grow into a bully. See this article. TV watching is being linked to increased aggression. And I don't think it's just the watching of violent programming that does it. If your ability to think clearly and express yourself verbally is impaired, aggression is the next resort toward making your will known.

In my opinion, the less TV a child watches, the better. That goes for adults too. READ A BOOK.

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Friday, September 30, 2005

Boring Preaching or Bored OF Preaching

One of my goodest friends and compadres, the Rev. Todd Peperkorn, of Kenosha, WI wrote this very honest post in his blog, The Lutheran Logomaniac. He talks of being in a sermon funk, or being tired of preaching.

As another youngish preacher, I know what he's talking about. On the one hand, I enjoy preaching. It is rewarding to craft sermons on the holy texts of our faith. But I also find it very difficult at times.

I think that Pr. Peperkorn has some insightful responses to his own predicament. One being, "Receive." He says a pastor needs to hear preaching himself. Absolutively. Although the logistics of that are not easy. And while most pastors really like to talk, they don't always know how to hear. Gotta work on that. In our office, we give God's gifts to people. As sinners, we need those same gifts. A lot of us Lutheran-types are good at preaching the gospel of forgiveness to others, but not so great at grasping it for ourselves. It's hard to preach to yourself.

I'd add a couple of reflections to Pr. Peperkorn's.

Things that impair my ability to preach and what to do about them:

  • Flutter. The dictionary defines "flutter" this way: To move quickly in a nervous, restless, or excited fashion; flit. Yep. Been there; done that. This is one way to derail preaching.

  • Being pulled in a hundred directions at once. Running around without taking time to smell the roses and re-fuel. This is true spiritually. But also physically, emotionally and intellectually. If I don't adequately recharge, I run out of juice.

    (Qualification: This is not alwasy the case. Sometimes, ironically, I have found that being insanely busy can cause me to focus. But usually, at least for me, it has the opposite effect.)

    Clutter. By this I mean mental clutter. I am easily distracted. I also have a wide variety of interests. So I usually am in the middle of three or four books, a half dozen journals, plus all the cares and concerns of church and family.

    In one respect, this can be good as it actually feeds my preaching. I read widely, in part, because it helps me have a clearer perspective on the world and our place in it. Being well-read and well-informed is also useful for illustrative purposes in sermon writing.

    Yet, as both a reader and a writer, I am coming to value simplicity more and more. Not simple in the sense of easy, but in the sense of being unpretentious. A sermon may be brilliant and poetic, but if it is too self-conscious the sermon can interfere with the whole purpose of preaching.


  • Sputter. The dictionary definition is: To spit out words or sounds in an excited or confused manner. By this, I mean the inability to write clear articulate prose that faithfully expounds the Biblical text while simultaneously addressing both the general and specific needs of the congregation.

  • I think we preachers need to recognize that a sermon must be written for the ear, not the eye. To be heard, not primarily to be read. When you are reading text on a page, you can pause, consider, reread words and phrases, something you cannot do sitting in the pew listening to me talk. It is much more important to be clear than to be clever. It is much more important to be understood than to be sophisticated. Of course, those are not necessarily mutually exclusive, but it is pointless to sacrifice being understood by your average hearer for literary excellence or oratorical profundity.

    Having said all that, neither am I in favor of “dumbing down” the message. Why does every John Doe think he should be able to enter a church service for the first time in eons and find everything instantly 100% comprehensible?

    The gospel is so simple, even a small child can understand it. And yet, the Scriptures are so wise, an entire lifetime is not long enough.

I am not old enough or wise enough to counsel any other preachers about the craft. I've got enough to tend to with Scott Stiegemeyer. I may judge what you say, but I will be quite hesitant to criticize how you say it. While substance is central, style is not irrelevant. The pendulum must not swing too far in either direction. Your style may not work for me with my congregation and mine may flop in yours.

Boring Preaching or Bored OF Preaching. The hardest thing, next to properly unwrapping the gospel in the text, is being . . . interesting. Week after week. Interesting but not cliche.

Once in a while, some humble parish pastor's preaching will be compared to the dynamic radio guy. Doctrine aside, people have to keep in mind that a lot of those celebrity preachers do little else. Does anyone really think that Dr. Charles Stanley still visits shut-ins? Or that D. James Kennedy has to put aside his sermon composition because he's got 3 unexpected hospital visits to make, two out-of-the-blue counseling sessions and a funeral?

I'm not complaining. Preaching is a strange vocation. It is holy, challenging, rewarding and unrewarding. It is a burden and a joy.

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Thursday, September 29, 2005

Priestly Celibacy and the Ordination of Women

The Roman Catholic Church, patricularly in the United States, is suffering from a shortage of clergy. In Pittsburgh, for instance, the pastors are aging and their replacements are too few. One solution has been to import priests from other countries, areas where there is an abundance of vocations.

The local news agencies are reporting that a controversial group is advocating two additional responses to the lack of priests:

1) Making priestly celibacy optional and
2) Ordaining women

This has generated quite a bit of interesting discussion on local Catholic blogs. See this from Ales Rarus.

My response. First, if people think that allowing clergy to marry and/or ordaining women will solve the Catholic priest shortage, the experience of other church bodies would seem to indicate otherwise. Many denominations have trouble recruiting and maintaining qualified clergy, even in spite of allowing married clergy and, in many cases, ordaining women. Certainly, these factors would make a difference, but at the same time we need to recognize that there are others factors at play.

On priestly celibacy. It should be obvious that I do not favor enforcing this discipline upon all the clergy. I, myself, am happily married (15 years of bliss) and have a child. And I am an ordained Lutheran pastor.

On the one hand, I can see the argument for having a celibate clergy. There is apostolic precedent in the Apostle Paul. And, of course, Jesus Himself (ridiculous novels aside). Being celibate gives a man freedom to devote himself more fully to his ministry. He is freed from the obligations and responsibilities of caring and providing for a family. From a more theological perspective, I admire the imagery of the pastor as a reflection of Christ, whose bride is the Church.

Nevertheless, requiring a man to be celibate is placing a tremendous burden on his back, one that our Lord did not require of his own 12 disciples. There is every reason to believe that most of them had families. Certainly we know from the Gospels that Peter was married.

The ability to lead a chaste celibate life is a gift. Only a very select few can successfully lead such a life. Even the Roman Church does not teach that this is a divine command, but an honored tradition.

The Creator has instilled in every man a natural desire to marry a woman and procreate. God commanded Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply. If a person chooses to remain celibate so that he can labor in the Lord's vineyard more completely, that is a wonderful thing. In this respect, St. Paul said that he wished everyone was like him - for the sake of extending the kingdom and edifying the church. But even he, a celibate himself, acknowledges that it is better to marry than to burn (with passion/lust).

I have often said that being married and having a family has made me a much better pastor than I would be otherwise. The love, support and joy I receive from my wife and son is beyond measure and significantly counter-balances the loneliness, suffering and burden of the ministry. I am honest enought to admit that I would be a far less effective person - in every way - were I still single.

On Women's Ordination. In this respect, I completely agree and support the position of Rome. I belong to one of the branches of Lutheranism which still does not ordain women. Of course, this is not in any way a comment on the capability of women to serve effectively in the church. There are numerous avenues for godly and scholarly women to do Kingdom work. But the explicit teaching of Scripture is that the pastoral office is restricted to males only (1 Corinthians 14 and 1 Timothy 2).

Beyond the passages one could cite, I find the example of our Lord to be quite convincing. Had Christ wanted there to be women pastors in His church, it seems likely that He would have had a more diverse collection of disciples. As it is, He chose 12 men. One cannot argue that He was only following the social conventions of His time, for on other occasions, He had no difficulty shattering such conventions to smithereens (i.e. John 4) . And in addition, if Jesus had intended for there to be women pastors, the most excellent candidate would have surely been His blessed mother.

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Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Protecting Our Kids . . . NOT

Did you know that in some parts of the United States, your 14-year-old daughter can get an abortion - not only without her parent's permission, but even without their knowledge!? But, she can't get her ears pierced or lie for 30 minutes in a tanning salon without a parent's Okie Dokie. Check this out.

I say, if tanning booths (vanity!) are dangerous for young skin, then it shouldn't matter if mom says it's alright. It should be banned.

We say we want to protect our children. A woman in a NY City park was given a ticket by police because she was in a playground area at a public park without a child of her own. Apparantly, you are not allowed to just hang around kids in a playground unless one of them is yours. I'm OK with that. Personally, I think all convicted pedophiles should be electrocuted to death.

Many conservative types, like myself, prefer fewer laws, less regulation. The Libertarians, for instance. I agree to a certain extent. But personal liberty and small government only work when you have population that is guided by an internal moral compass. And that we do not have. The less our population is formed by the teachings of Holy Writ so that they may exercise self-restraint, the more it become necessary for the external restraints of civil government. Personally, if I had to choose, I'd rather live under tyranny and martial law than anarchy.

So, I'm a defender of enacting onerous laws and regulations to protect children. That's why I think all abortions should be made a felony. Why are we selective about which children we protect?

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Monday, September 26, 2005

Very Funny Song

Raging Rabbits has posted a link to one laugh out loud funny song. But then, I have a pretty silly sense of humor sometimes.

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Demonology Discussion

With the recent film, The Exorcism of Emily Rose, the topics of exorcism and demonic possession have been getting renewed attention. It seems clear to me that there are some not-so-good risks about stirring up too much interest in Satan and his demons. We don't want to do or say anything which might cause impressionable people to develop an unhealthy fascination with the occult. However, I think that it is equally dangerous to speak of the devil too little. The New Testament does not allow us that option. St. Peter wrote: "Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith. . . (1 Peter 5:8-9a)."

The Christian can be confident that Satan is a defeated enemy. But he and his minions can still cause great harm and mischief in our lives. Demons certainly are behind many of the messes in the lives of the people we seek to minister to. So be sober and watchful.

I just discovered an interesting new blog called One True God Blog. Its contributors are theologians and writers who represent Evangelicalism, Roman Catholicism and Eastern Orthodoxy. Here is their discussion on demons.

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Saturday, September 24, 2005

Pro-Abortion Media: Saying the Opposite of What You Mean

If you read a headline that said, Irish Favour Legalising Abortion, what would you assume would be the substance of the article? Doesn't this headline lead you to think that, gee, I dunno, the Irish people are in favor of legalizing abortion? Is that a fair assumption, do ya think?

Well, what if you then actually read the article and the first sentence said: Irish voters under 35 strongly favour legalising abortion, but if a referendum on permitting abortion was held now it would be defeated, according to an opinion poll.

The rest of the article goes on to give statistics showing that though the young and hip crowd would like a referendum on the current law, in fact, the majority of the Irish people are against it. Don't you think the more sensible title of the article should be: Irish Don't Favour Legalising Abortion?

What's up with that?

My thanks to Jivinjehashaphat for this.

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Friday, September 23, 2005

Book Tag

I love these things. I have been tagged by Cubicle Reverend to participate in a meme.

1. Total number of books you own?

Unknown. We have books and bookshelves in every room of the house. There are piles and stacks of books all over my home study. And my church study has bookshelves along 3 of 4 walls.


2. What is the last book(s) you bought?

I utilize our local public library and inter-library loan system a lot. I'm actually trying to cut down my book purchases a little, because there's only so much space out there. But the last books I bought were:

- "God and the World" by Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger (now Pope Benedict XVI)
- A commentary on Colossians by Paul E. Deterding


3. What was the last book you read?

- "The Beardless Warriors" by Richard Matheson (a compelling WWII novel)
- "The Cases that Haunt Us" by John Douglas
- "Prozac Nation" by Elizabeth Wurtzel (about to finish)


4. List 5 books that are particularly meaningful to you (in no particular order):

a)
The Book of Concord (the Lutheran confessions of 1580)
b) The Chronicles of Narnia (actually 7 slim volumes) by C.S. Lewis
c) The Lord of the Rings (3 volumes) by J.R.R. Tolkien
d) The Fire and the Staff by Klemet Preus (a very enjoyable summary of Lutheran doctrine and practice)
e)
Citizen Soldier by Stephen Ambrose (I wanted to mention something non-fiction that was not a book of theology. And this is a fascinating study of the American G.I. of WWII.)


5. Tag five people, any five people who read:

Incarnatus Est

Jottings and Such

Beggars All

The Southern Conservative

Tales from the Dorkside

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Expert Tells Congress Global Warming Not to Blame

What's going on? Last year it was Florida. This year, it's Katrina and now Rita. You, like I, have probably heard the speculation that the recent spate of intense hurricanes that have hit our U.S. gulf coast in the last few years are partly the result of global warming.

One of our nation's chief hurricane experts disagrees. Go here and here to read what Max Mayfield, the Director of The National Hurricane Center has to say. He testified to congress saying that it is simply part of a natural cycle. If it were global warming, then we should be seeing the same effects worldwide. But that is not the case. In fact, he states, in some areas, hurricane activity has significantly decreased.

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Thursday, September 22, 2005

"Gotta Serve Somebody"

Bob Dylan sang, "You gotta serve somebody. It might be the devil. Or it might be the Lord. But you gotta serve somebody."

Well, here is a good question for us: Is a pastor the servant of the congregation? Or is he a servant of Christ Jesus? The answer is "yes."

A Christian pastor is not a lord or master over his congregation. So he is not to tyrannize them. This happens whenever a pastor tries to micromanage every sphere of congregational life and sometimes when he allows his lay leaders no opportunity to make decisions of any consequence. In other words, I don't have to impose my ideas about our new parking lot construction as if I'm the boss. I have plenty of people here who know more about that than I do.

A pastor also becomes a tyrant when he asserts his own personal opinions as the Word of God. For instance, I may have very strong political views. Would it surprise you if I do? But outside of teaching people what the Bible says about certain moral issues and the role of government, I don't have any business - as their pastor - of commanding people to vote for this candidate or another. I suppose I could envision scenarios were this would be otherwise, but not often in our democracy would this be the case.

Or a pastor can become a tryant when he tries to govern his members in ways that do not belong to the pastoral ministry. I can (must) tell someone if they are living in a sinful manner. But I can't tell them whom to marry, which house to buy, where to send their children to school, etc. I can (must) exercise church discipline with unrepentant sinners, but I have no civil authority over them.

There have been ministers who have abused their holy office in the ways mentioned above. But at the other end of the spectrum, you have congregations who want to tyrannize their pastors. That is no less ungodly. There was a fine book published a few years back called Clergy Killers. And it's about a growing tendency of congregations to adopt a "hire-and-fire" mentality. "We hired you. You work for us. Do what we say, or we'll can you."

But the fact of the matter is, I don't work for my congregation. I am not their employee. I am a servant called by God, through the congregation. But I answer to God first, my church council or board of elders second. And where those two entities may conflict, God gets my first allegiance. Now, I personally, have been blessed not to have a tyrannical congregation, not in the least. Quite the opposite. They are loving, generous, kind and willing to be taught from Holy Scripture. They have also exercised an extraordinary measure of patience for their young, relatively inexperienced pastor. And I can only pray that I will never be a harsh overlord toward them.

Sometimes pastors can be over-bearing, but an over-bearing church board can be just as pernicious to the kingdom of God. God tells us to submit one to another. It's like marriage. Without submission, mutually, there can be no love-making.

Yes, the pastor serves the congregation, but he does so as an agent of Jesus Christ. He serves Christ in the sense that he is waiting on the Body of Christ. Jesus told Peter, "feed my lambs." We are the undershepherds who answer to the chief Shepherd and bishop of our souls.

Pastor David Petersen, over at Cyberstones, has a further reflection on these sentiments.

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Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Is It a Sin To Be Stupid?

In the Lutheran denomination I belong to, it is recognized that the only legitimate reasons to expell a pastor from his call are: persistence in false doctrine, openly immoral life, and physical or mental incapacitation. It's a good thing that "doing something stupid" is not one of those criteria. Every pastor, myself included, makes foolish mistakes. But sometimes you hear about something that just makes you ask "What in the world was he thinking?!?!"

CBS News reports that a 78 year old Roman Catholic priest in Austin, Texas asked a group of children to come forward during mass - I'm guessing for some kind of children's sermon or something - and he proceeded to prick each one of them with a pin.

When I read this article, I was dumbfounded. Apparently, he'd taken a single unsterilzed needle and poked, breaking skin mind you, a flock of children. The article also states that he nailed a few adults in this stupid exercise as well. He claims that this was to illustrate that suffering is part of life and that Jesus suffered for us.

So what's the big stinkin' deal, you ask? Let me count the ways:

1) It's a health risk. Especially if it's true that he poked adults as well as children. Do you trust your fellow parishoners enough to share needles with them? Anyone hear of HIV or hepatitis? I realize the risk is probably relatively small, but it was a stupid thing to do. Listen, I'd drink the blood of Christ out of a chalice in a cathedral full of AIDS patients, but I would not let someone prick my son and two dozen of our closest friends with a single needle.

2) The report says that the priest wanted to teach them about the pain that Jesus suffered on the cross and, in his words, "that suffering is a part of life." Oh come on. There are much better ways to teach children about the pain Jesus endured. How about a good scourging? And it is ridiculous, in my mind, to think that we need to give pin pricks to children to teach them a lesson most of them ALREADY know all too well. That life hurts.

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Tuesday, September 20, 2005

I've Seen "The Exorcism of Emily Rose" and Here Is What I Think

"The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the work of the devil." - 1 John 3:8

Many of you have perhaps seen the new movie called The Exorcism of Emily Rose. It appears to be doing well at the box office as a fall release. It has attracted the attention of the media, in part, because the director is a professing Christian and the movie is based upon a true account.
This week's WORLD magazine has an interview with Scott Derrickson, the director. Today, I went to see it and in my evaluation, it is a very good movie.

As the title suggests, a girl named Emily Rose is possessed by evil spirits. This occurs while she is away for her freshman year of college. The priest who eventually performs her exorcism is on trial for negligent homicide (or something like that). I don't want to give away too much of the plot, but that is the initial setup.

The movie is a mixture of the genres of horror and courtroom drama. The trial is taking place in the present with the scenes of Emily's possession and exorcism shown as flashbacks. It has some genuinely scary moments and disturbing images. But if you go expecting to see a typical gross-out bloodfest or tons of computer generated special effects, you will be disappointed.

The cast was excellent. Laura Linney plays the agnostic defense attorney for Father Moore, played by Tom Wilkenson. Campbell Scott is the devoutly Methodist prosecutor. And Jennifer Carpenter excelled in the title role. In particular, I must single out Wilkenson and Carpenter.

It was so heartening to see a Roman Catholic priest portrayed in a major Hollywood film so sympathetically and believably. And there is nothing less secularized or rationalistic than showing a priest performing an exorcism. Wilkenson's Father Moore is intelligent, compassionate, and devout. He is also articulate and courageous.

And Jennifer Carpenter. . . what can I say? I almost wondered if she really was possessed. It was creepy, but she and the director exercised just the right amount of restraint with her character. I really felt sorry for the girl she played and then came to admire her.

I'm a fan of Billy Friedkin's 1973 film adaptation of William Peter Blatty's book The Exorcist. But I am tempted to say that this was a better movie. I really liked the less sensationalist approach. Y'know the spinning head and pea soup projectile vomiting was a bit much. Plus, honestly, this movie is just less disgusting all round. Less blaspemous language, less sexual perversity, etc. Now that may be a mark against it in terms of realism. But I think if you are trying to make a film to convince the average Joe that there is more to life than Horatio's philosophy (as Shakespeare's Dane would say), going too far with the spectacle can be distracting.

One criticism I would level at the director is that I hate it when horror movies just try to startle you with a sudden loud noise or someone jumping out from behind a door. And it's not because I don't like to be startled - because actually I kinda do - but because it's low brow. If you can't frighten me with the story, the plot or the characterizations, then forget about it. Don't jump at me and yell, "Boo!"

There are some theological deviations here and there. I wouldn't say it is a Christ-centered story. The article of justification is never articulated. Alone, it will not convert anyone.

But here is why I believe this film, and others like it, are important. It treats Christian doctrine and the Christian church with respect. And it promotes the idea that there are spiritual realities in the universe we inhabit. In an increasingly secularist age, it is helpful to instill the belief that some things cannot be explained by science or dissected under a microscope. And though it doesn't give the explanation of how, it is clearly shown that the Christian Church holds the key to salvation.

But I will go further and say that I appreciated the movie because it is about Satan. And it's not a farce or an exploitive caricature of Satan. No, this is the real deal. The two errors people can fall into with regard to the devil is to think about him too much or to think about him too little. For those who think about him too little, consider that Jesus spoke about Satan and hell quite a bit. Most of what we know about hell comes from the mouth of Jesus Christ.

If I were an average Joe, someone who generally considered himself a Christian but didn't attend church or pay much attention to religion, I think this movie would get under my skin. And that appears to have been the express intention of the director. Movies like this would make me afraid to go to hell. And that would be useful progress for many people, even some people who sit numbly in our pews week after week.

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Monday, September 19, 2005

How to Pick a Church

With the American love affair with the automobile, it is no longer seen as necessary to attend a church near one's home. I know people who drive past half a dozen churches to get to the one they choose. Well, how is this choice made?

Unfortunately, I fear, many people make a church choice based on not-so-good reasons. I am not one of those who says that all churches are basically the same or that our denominational differences do not matter any more. I think the differences do matter because truth matters. Denominational differences arose from doctrinal disputes. And while Christian history has not been free of petty arguments, legitimate doctrinal differences should not be simply glossed over.

You see, I am of the conviction that the Bible is the Word of God. Inspired and Inerrant. So differences of interpretation are not merely personal preference, opinion or whim. They are disagreements about what God has said. And since presumably all Christians care to know what God has truly said in His Word, we want to clarify and be certain that we know what we believe. For instance, when Jesus said, "This is my Body...", he either meant "This bread truly is my body," or He meant "The bread merely represents (thus 'is not') my body." Which is it? Jesus said it. I think His intention was to be understood.

My point is that doctrine should be the chief criterion by which a person or a family determines which church to join. Not the personality of the pastor. Not the beautiful architecture. Not the accomplished musicians. Not the size, the wealth or the racial makeup of the congregation.

Of course, I speak as the pastor of a small congregation. I have seen people choose a church that teaches (or tolerates) false doctrine merely because they have a bigger Sunday school or a more dynamic youth group. Hey, I'm all in favor of big and dynamic. And when the doctrine is straight, those are fine reasons to select a congregation.

What trouble me - and what I hope troubles you - is the rampant indifference to teaching.

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Friday, September 16, 2005

Cosmetics sold in UK Made From Human Remains

A story in The Guardian earlier this week reports that cosmetic products made in China from the skin of executed prisoners is being marketed in the United Kingdom. Sounds like the nice lampshades and wallets made out of Jews in the 1940s. Only with one difference, in this case no one seems to mind that much.

There is no outrage in The Guardian's reporting. Only the briefest suggestion that this might be immoral or wrong in some way. It's not technically illegal. A "grey area" they say. I thought Europeans were generally so anti-capital punishment. But, I guess, since they're from China, the likelihood that these prisoners were Christians or champions of democracy is great. Killing such folk doesn't seem to irritate Europeans as much as it used to.

In the article, much was made of the fact that using human remains to make cosmetics is culturally acceptable to the Chinese. It's hard to miss the implication that we shouldn't be too quick to impose our benighted Western values on another culture.

But I'd bet you a coke that if these cosmetics are tested on lab animals first, there'll be picketing in the streets of London.

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Thursday, September 15, 2005

The Exorcism of Emily Rose

The Exorcism of Emily Rose is a new film based on a true account of a woman who is deemed to be demon possessed by the Catholic church. Something goes wrong in the course of her exorcisms and she dies. The priest who was performing the rites then faces trial. I haven't seen it yet, so I cannot comment much directly on it. But the reviews have been intriguing, though quite mixed.

Blogger Darrell at Southern Conservative loved it and recommends that all Christians go see it. Go here to Christianity Today for an overview of reviewer opinions.

Have you seen it and what did you think?

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Potty Humor

I have to say, I laughed when I read this.

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Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Banning Marriage (Gay and Otherwise)

A new political party in Sweden called The Feminist Initiative is running on a platform calling for the abolition of marriage. All marriage. The idea, allegedly, is that marriage "is not about love, but about ownership." Instead they propose some sort of domestic partner arrangement that would not take gender into consideration at all, nor would it be restricted to only two partners. I'm frankly shocked at their intolerant approach. They do not permit sheep and goats to become legal partners with humans! That's species-ism! Somehow this is seen as a good move for women. Well, how does this party try to appeal to male voters? A six hour work-day. I'm sure all the Mr. Mom's are miffed at the assumption that all the men out there are the bread-winners. That's sooo retro.

What's next people?!

Here's the link, since I wouldn't blame you for thinking I made this up. Someone please tell me this is a spoof. I don't think it is.

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Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Great Books on Depression

Not the "Great Depression," as in the stock market crash of 1929. But well written memoir type books by people who've suffered from severe depression. Right now, I'm enjoying Prozac Nation by Elizabeth Wurtzel. She's really a very good writer. Other good ones include Girl, Interrupted by Susanna Kayson and The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath. None of these come from a Christian perspective but they are very enlightening and insightful reads nonetheless.

Here is an intriguing quote from Prozac Nation:

Homesickness is just a state of mind for me. I'm always missing someone or someplace or something; I'm always trying to get back to some imaginary somewhere. My life has been one long longing.

Wow! She's on to something. Life without God is an emptiness that cannot be filled with anything the world has to offer. And we have access to God and receive fullness in Jesus Christ, the Crucified.

It makes me think of that prayer from St. Augustine: Our hearts are restless, O Lord, until they rest in Thee.

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Help Promote the Burr

Help me promote my blog.

Slowly, my daily readership is increasing. It's becoming common now for me to get 100+ different visitors a day, on average. That's cool, but I'd love to reach even more.

If you read a post here that you find interesting, insightful, or even annoying, please share it with a friend. Did you know about the "email-a-post" feature? There's a little envelope image at the bottom of every post. Click that and you can send it to whomever you like. Keep coming back yourself and encourage people you know to read The Burr in the Burgh.

O.K., shameless self-promotion completed.

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New Curriculum at Concordia Theological Seminary